Hunger Pangs

There is no easy way to ease into what I believe God has given me to write about, because I know it could possibly offend some people. That is never my intention, because I desire wholeheartedly for people to be free in every area of their lives. So I have to speak on what I believe is a problem area in many of our lives. One thing about me, I have never been timid in my words, verbally or written, so I pray that what I am about to expound on will be received in love.   But if it is not... be offended, be honest, and then be free. :-)

Our (social media infused) society is such a conceited, arrogant, Godless society, mainly because we are so full of ourselves. I look at my timeline on various social media sites every day and just say wow sometimes. It is hard to believe, but people (even some of whom I know personally) are really full of themselves. This narcissistic spiritual force is a very powerful, toxic character trait that will take over your mind. It is also very disgusting, unattractive and seriously bad for our spiritual and physical lives. We have allowed this new wave of media convince us that promoting self ALL THE TIME is our only true way to exhibit happiness, worth or value.

We have been manipulated into believing that if we don't post a "selfie" every hour or uploading every single picture we take when we are out enjoying ourselves with friends and family, then we truly are not and cannot be happy in our lives or having a good time in that moment. We have become obsessively obsessed with "showing off". Showing off our lives, not to share ourselves and our moments with the ones we love, but to either make others feel inadequate and/or make sure our followers and friends believe that we are happy. We are not living, we probably aren't even slightly happy....we are putting on a show, performing, portraying and starring in a reoccurring role and series as a pompous, holier than thou caricature that alludes and exaggerates prominence....and the scripted character in which we are playing name is Idolatry.  And unfortunately, we believe this role we have taken on is perfectly fine.

It is so sad how bad we have fallen for this lie from the pits of hell. Oh but there is some truth to what it is though, it is the epitome of being prideful. And remember, pride always comes before the fall.  We are walking and living in the most self serving, self worshiping, egotistical and maliciously snobbish days right now.  These traits will take up so much space in your hearts and minds that a true hunger for God cannot exist. If you don't have a true hunger for God minus yourself, you are creating a breeding ground for selfishness and cannot possibly be growing in a more purposeful relationship with God the father, or in faith.  And without faith, it is impossible to please Him. 

Do not be fooled, there is no standing still or stagnation in your relationship with Him. You can't hit the pause button and be only about yourself for a while. Either you are growing and moving selflessly forward in your relationship with God or growing and moving selfishly backwards in yourself, which will always be away from God. Be so hungry for God that He is at the forefront of your thoughts versus yourself.  Be hungry for His righteousness and to be seen in it, rather than being self-righteous only to be seen in your own self-righteousness. There is a fine line between the two and it is important that we know what side of the line we are on.  Are you living for God's righteousness or are you living for self-righteousness? Are you doing it for the true and living God, or are you doing it for the Gram? 

Whatever your answers are to those questions are between you and the Father. But the good thing about Him is He is forgiving and will reveal what is sincerely in your heart. The first step in this discovery is to examine your intentions. If it is revealed that your intentions have been impure, there is still hope. The next step is to ask for forgiveness, receive your forgiveness, and deliverance will follow.  And once you have been delivered, I promise, God's grace will make your heart so full of His love, the only love that can truly fill what we unknowingly crave from others, that the desire to put on the show for self-adoration will finally be put to rest.

~CDL 
xoxo

The Lost and Found

"The more I find myself, the more people I lose..."

That quote speaks volumes.  It is so ironic because I just had a convo about the same very topic not too long ago with my brother. I believe the ultimate purpose of losing people is to find yourself. The losses are for you, for your gain. Learning to stand alone is hard...no friends, no family, no significant other or mate, it can be extremely difficult...seriously, I know this all too well....but it is the essential essence of self examination and discovery. And honestly, the only way you will truly learn who you are. I have lost people I sincerely valued and earnestly loved because I chose to live beyond the box, I mean waaaaaaaay off the grid. I have cried over dead end relationships until I couldn't cry anymore.  I have mourned broken friendships like someone had died. And I won't begin to explain my emotional condescension for not being listed on a few wedding, bridal and baby shower guests lists because I was apparently no longer "around". And that's perfectly ok. Cry over the spilled relational milk, have an international anger fest, wipe up the mess and go back to skipping to the beat of your own drum.  What I had to recognize is my purpose and plan is written in a different font and color, so I don't match with basic formatting. And i'm not just talking about myself,  I like to believe that our purpose and plans are all written in different fonts and colors, because that is the beauty of humanity and the creator who so eloquently created us. Through it all, I am blessed to have been courageous enough to keep going. I am blessed to have been courageous enough to venture to all the places I've ever wanted to live and be, like I have. Alone. I never would have gotten to know, LOVE and continue to learn who Crystal Dion really is being 1/2 of a pair or staying and residing in a residential or relational space that's only comfortable for others and not myself. And finally... one day, all by myself, I made the grown woman decision to refuse to let those who have fallen by the wayside take away the grandeur of my elevation toward my God inspired purpose, favor and success. What's fearful to some is air to others. I'm going to say that again..."What is fearful to some, is air to others." If you look closely, i'm sure you will find that you may have adapted to fears that aren't even yours, which is why you are smothering. Because you cannot breathe.  Their air is not your air, and their fear is not your fear. Comprehend that now.  Change is good and it has always looked good on me.  And it will look good on you if you allow it to.   Embrace the characteristics of your change...love, live, breathe your change...remain for no one. Your life, the persona God has blessed you with is dependent on it.  Because after you have found yourself, the next chapter in life is discovering who God created you to be. And honey, let me tell you, that is the season you have been waiting for all along. Let the lost go and be found.

~CDL

 ❤️xoxo❤️